Auld Lang Syne

It's New Years Day, so of course I feel obligated to reflect on what I've been doing and where I'm going in my life. However, feel free to skip over this post if you really don't care to read my musings over my personal life and future--I won't blame you.

If you do decide to read this, I'll try my best to make my personal reflections generally applicable to all, so maybe someone can derive some benefit from me indulging in a narcissistic moment.

So here I am, a junior in college, and it's beginning to sink in: Wow. I'll have to get a job and be on my own soon. I've always had dreams and ambitions for my life, but really, what do those look like? Yes, I want to be a self-employed writer who lives in the country, and I have some other vague ideas of owning a few small businesses, but how do I get there? Can I really make a living doing this? What if I happen to be married by then? And then kids? What am I truly aiming and wishing for here?

And who am I working to please? Myself, others, or God? When I consider the life I'm dreaming of, I think it'll suit me very well, but there's so much about it that might seem "weird" to other people. Will I allow other people's opinions to dissuade me from what I truly want?

Then there's the question of whether what I'm desiring for my life is what God is desiring for my life. Many years ago, I gave my life to Him, and told Him to do with it as He saw fit. I meant it then, and I still mean it. But what happens when my personal dreams conflict with what He's planning?

"Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen." - Eph. 3:20-21 (ESV Study Bible)

That first part, "who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think," is maybe something I should keep in mind as I plan my next step after graduation. Do I know all the opportunities that exist? Is the life I'm dreaming of truly what I want? How do I know He hasn't planned something better?

The second part, "according to the power at work within us," reminds me to keep growing and developing in my relationship with Him. Who knows what amazing adventures He has planned for me, as long as I continue to develop my faith and obedience? What kind of life could He reveal to me that is infinitely beyond my personal dreams, due to my being a "faithful servant"? I need to remember that God knows (better than I do) what He has crafted in me, and will take into account my talents, values, and spiritual maturity level before He calls me to the life He envisions for me. There's no reason to think He's planning something miserable or boring.

"The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps." - Prov. 16:9 (ESV Study Bible)

So many people worry they'll make plans that are outside God's will for their lives. Consequently, they're so crippled by their fears that they fail to ever take any action. But as for me, I think I'll steer out into the sea with my personal plans, with the sails down and a loose grip on the tiller, ready for my course to be shifted by God-sent winds.