Slavery, and quite possibly the most hypocritical thing I've ever written

I randomly found this online survey that estimated "How many slaves work for you," as in, "How many things do you regularly buy that come from materials that were mined or manufactured by slaves?" It was interesting and slightly eye-opening, but they lost me at, "Get the app to fight slavery with your Android or iPhone - Ask brands at the store you shop in about where their raw materials come from, and check-in so your friends can help, too."

So let me get this straight, survey. You just told me that slaves in India are forced to mine, under horrific working conditions, for the coltan in my smart phone, and that workers in iPhone factories in China regularly try to commit suicide in the factories they work in because the working hours are so arduous, but now you're attempting to assuage my guilt and even pump me up with a shred of self-righteousness and some less personally sacrificial surface solution, by further encouraging my irresponsible consumer habits under the guise of a hip (and social!) medium?

Oh, and this is after you've called me "stupid" at one point, too. I don't need your pretentious snark, survey!

But to those of you who are reading this, before you point out the obvious hypocrisy of me typing this out on my expensive laptop while wearing my cotton clothes as I slowly roll side-to-side on my rubber yoga ball/desk chair, let me do it for you: I'm a hypocrite.

Yes, I beat you to it (don't you go all stealin' mah thunda! ;). I'm very slowly coming to grips with the realization that much of what I buy is, completely or at least in part, made by slave hands. And by "slowly," I mean I'm only just starting to try and phase things out of my life one at a time, the most major thing right now being chocolate.


Oh lands, yes. You read that right. Chocolate.


Now, before you get all weird about worrying that I'll somehow be offended at your next birthday party where you want to have a chocolate cake, let me assure you, I'm not going to be an obnoxious douche (for lack of a better term) about this. You want chocolate cake? Hurrah! It's your birthday! I like you! I like chocolate! I'll eat some! Here's what won't happen:


"Oh no thanks--I personally don't find the hopeless tears of children stolen from their families and forced into indentured slavery in another country to farm cacao beans for major chocolate corporations to be that delicious, BUT THAAAANNNNKKKKSSSS......"

So no smug, douche-y comments from me--like, ever--and I'm going to happily eat the cake. Hokay? Hokay :).

But I digress. My point is, my admittedly slow acceptance of the truth about my favorite goods, and trying to make smarter consumer decisions, is really hard. Srsly u guyz, EVERYTHING IS SLAVERY. But in the face of my faith, I just can't reconcile not trying to make better buying decisions.

I can't track every single ingredient or material used in every single food or product I buy, but I'm willing to try. And if I hear about how thousands of people are being exploited and forced to work in inhumane conditions to produce the new, cool product I've been eyeing, I hope I'm strong enough to resist the temptation and remember that I can't use my dollar to silently agree with this anymore.

It'll be hard, and I'm sure I'll find out horrifying details about even the things I think aren't compromising ("Oh, you're enjoying that 'fair trade coffee,' hmm? That's nice. TOO BAD IT WAS PROCESSED IN A FACTORY WHERE WORKERS ROUTINELY LOSE THEIR FINGERS IN THE GIGANTIC COFFEE GRINDER THAT ONLY RUNS ON THE BLAZING FIRE OF ENDANGERED TREES!"), but again, I'm willing to try and be smarter about what I consume, and I accept that it might have to happen gradually.

Just to clarify, I realize a lot of working conditions and salaries that we consider to be horrific over here aren't viewed the same way in some circumstances in other countries. You and I might not enjoy breaking rocks in the sweltering African sun for only 30 cents an hour, but I do recognize that sometimes those working conditions don't seem bad to the people who have to work in them. 30 cents an hour might allow one family to buy food and send their children to school, depending on the country. I'm not talking about those who are actually perfectly happy with their wages and work (and don't need a well-meaning but out of touch American to come along and mess it up for them).

I'm talking about those who are forced to work for unsustainable lengths of time, are beaten and/or sexually exploited if they don't, and are paid far below what they need to survive. These are the conditions I'm silently protesting with my dollar.

Weirdly enough, the decision to stop eating commercial chocolate just sort of "happened" one day. I was reaching for some "Sweet and Salty Dark Chocolate Nut Blend" thing, and some documentary I had seen months before (and hadn't exactly forgotten about up this moment) came to mind, and I just thought, "You know, how can I eat this chocolate, knowing that it came directly from the hands of scared, kidnapped slave children?"


OK, now I'm starting to sound like I'm getting smug, and you're probably thinking that I think you're a jerk because you might not have this same conviction. But I don't! I promise! You're probably super awesome at only buying local produce and actually doing Meatless Mondays, or something, but I'm not there yet. Or maybe you sponsor a child overseas--I'm not currently doing that! So there's no judgment here, trust me. Your first step to making the world a better place in Jesus' name was different from mine, but both of our steps are equally valid.


Ugh, I feel like this has been all over the place. I'm sorry. I think I maybe wrote this more to suss out my thoughts rather than have a huge "insight" to share, but I'm glad I wrote this out. Hopefully (maybe?) this will help someone else, and if you're curious about "chocolate slavery," here's the documentary, "The Dark Side of Chocolate" (no worries, it's public):

Psalm 10 also comes to mind, as I'm processing all of this. I was picturing the wicked man the psalmist describes as the one who takes these slaves captive and holds them there, assuming that God won't see him and come for those he is exploiting, but now I'm wondering, "By buying these products, are we the wicked ones, too?"


I'm encouraging these wicked people to enslave and exploit innocents, because I continue to buy the goods that use the materials they produce. Can I really, in good conscience, say that I haven't had a direct hand in slavery, just by being a mindless consumer? Deep stuff :(.

The Heart's Displaced Affections

"For where your treasure is, your heart will be also." - Matt. 6:21 (ESV)

Have you ever stopped to think where your heart is?


I really hadn't. Not until this morning as I read Matthew 6, at least. So often we read this scripture and presume it's referring to material things, but as I thought about it, we can really store up treasures in just about anything, can't we?


People place their treasures (really, you could substitute the word "treasures" with "hope") in fame, relationships, security, popularity, worldly acceptance, love and so much more, but rarely do we have enough foresight to keep our eyes trained heavenward and remember to act in such a way down here on earth so that we store our treasures in heaven.


I suppose this scripture hit me especially hard because I recently realized how much treasure I place in my relationships. It's good to love your friends and be in community, but I've taken it so far that if anything negative happens in my relationships, I'm disproportionately distraught. Why? If I were to be honest, it's because I'm looking for the completely steady and unconditional love from people that I can only find in a perfect God who is Love incarnate.


I think it's interesting that shortly after Jesus says this, He follows it with, "No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other..." - Matt. 6:24 (ESV)


Think about where your heart is. If you're like me and your heart's affections are displaced sometimes, you can probably identify where you're storing your treasures. Think about instances where you may have done or said something that contradicted what you knew Scripture would tell you to do. Maybe it's that moment when you felt the tug to divulge that juicy rumor you heard about someone to a new group of friends, trying to break in with them, or that urge to run from a money problem because you were afraid of appearing powerless in front of your peers. Or maybe you thought, "If I just sleep with this person, they won't leave me."


Pay attention to what threatens to wound your pride or makes you fight to ensure you don't look weak, insecure, helpless, or "stupid." Those things you're fighting to protect can be indicators of where your treasure lies.


It's easier said than done, but let's pay attention to where our hearts are and ask ourselves, "Are our hearts centered on God? Or this meaningless, worldly pursuit of fame, power, popularity, wealth, etc?"

Bad blessings?

Is it bad to want blessings?

Subconsciously, my answer would be "yes." How many times have we heard the ridiculous "prosperity gospel" that says we should expect blessings, even sometimes demand them? ("The Prayer of Jabez," anyone?)

I feel like the "prosperity gospel" and its polar opposite, the "radically live for Jesus" movement, have both made Christians feel guilty for wanting or receiving blessings. I feel the prosperity gospel and the radical movement have had the same unfortunate effect on Christians: Making us feel guilty when we "selfishly" hope for blessings.

To be clear, I'm not defining blessings in a strictly material sense. God can and sometimes does choose to bless us materially (see Solomon in 1 Kings 3:13 and Job in Job 42:10, 12-17), but we forget about the blessing of, say, peace of mind, or joy, or increased faith. Or maybe a new opportunity because we've been faithful in the small things (Luke 16:10).

There are blessings to being obedient, and I know I have somehow forgotten that. I've fallen into the "radical movement" camp of thought that says we should just stoically follow our God and be "warriors" of faith, standing silent and firm against temptation and attacks, never expecting it to be easy, and accepting the Christian life is full of purifying fire and difficulty with no reprieve, ever. You should follow God's laws for no other reason than to bring glory to Him--your own happiness and comfort will never be considered, and you're selfish and your "heart isn't in the right place" if you ever think it should be otherwise.

Christianity = Sleep on a bed made of stone with your teeth gritted, expecting to be woken up by a mocker with a flaming whip made of thorns and broken glass. Take the abuse silently, expect your reward to be a nod from Lieutenant General God, then go back to sleep on your stone pallet to wait for the next day for it to happen again. If you're lucky, maybe your mocking attacker will break down and repent due to your unwavering stoicism.

Sorry--a bit of hyperbole to make my point. I realize not everyone has this view, but it's what I've fallen into recently, and it took a phone call to wake me up.

I recently became convicted about something I was doing, and I decided listen and stop doing it. I was tempted, I overcame, and I had this wonderful sense of peace and calm because of it--I knew God was very happy and relieved that I had chosen the harder path. I realized He was blessing me with this peace that I hadn't felt in months, and I was happy just to bask in it.

But that same day I received a phone call from a potential client--the first I've had in my fledgling business--and I just felt like God was saying, "I'm blessing you with something you really want [a client] because you obeyed Me."

And it hit me: Why don't more Christians talk about the personal blessings that come from being obedient? I feel all I ever hear about is how we should be obedient because we're "supposed to" and so we'll be a "light to the world." Both of those reasons are wonderful and completely true, but sometimes it's hard feeling like you're just this robot who has no dreams or hopes, but is supposed to instead do something just because it's how we're "programmed."

I obeyed God, which in turn glorified Him, which is great and something I hope for. But it didn't stop there. Because of my obedience, He blessed me. I would've been happy just to have that blessing of peace, but I was blessed more (in this particular instance) with something else I've been hoping for.

For me, I've got to say I like being incentivized to obey more often with the promise of not just "You did the right thing. Yay you," but an actual blessing. And for me, that blessing can be something as simple as that peace and happiness I felt for knowing I obeyed God and made Him happy--He didn't have to add on that phone call, and I don't expect Him to do things like that every time. This kind of obedience feels a lot more happy, weightless and doable than the "Suck it up and just DO it, soldier!" kind.

I realize blessings don't always come right after obedience, and sometimes it's going to feel like I'm being pushed and tried even further. But I realized that our God is a God of blessings, and they do come out eventually, even if it's several years down the road, or even in the next life. But just knowing that they do has suddenly made obedience seem a lot easier, and my God a lot more friendly and loving again :).

Emotions > Intellect?

Last night I had a very, very important realization: Most of what troubles me in my faith is my dependence on feelings.

God feels far away.

I don't feel forgiven.

It feels like God is disappointed in me right now.

It doesn't feel like God is leading me to do that, but I don't know why.

But what happens when your spiritual life is dominated by your emotions? Doesn't emotion have a place in our spiritual walk? Yes, it does. But I realized last night that emotion's place in my spiritual walk had usurped the highest authority in my walk with Christ; His Word, and what it tells me is true about Him.

God told me He would never leave or forsake me? (Deut. 31:6) God told me that He casts my sin as far as the east is from the west and remembers them no more? (Psalm 103:12) God told me that He loves me? (John 3:16) God told me what He requires of me? (Micah 6:8) Doesn't matter; my feelings say otherwise.

However, I listened to a Breakaway podcast yesterday entitled "Robe Your Mind for Action," and the guest speaker, Jennifer Wilkin, made an excellent point about how we usually approach Scripture with self-application in mind. We read it to "get something out of it," when what we really need to do is make sure we understand that we're learning about our God first, then we can make personal applications based upon that knowledge.

She also made an excellent point about reading Scripture to gain wisdom from knowledge. Knowledge of our God and His statutes enables us to make wise decisions about how we should engage our world, use our resources, etc. This morning I was debating whether I should try out a new church because I barely slept last night, but what if I was supposed to go? Oh Father, what do I do? Would You please guide me and tell me what I should do?

Almost immediately an answer came back: "What do you know about how I feel regarding church?"

He was inviting me to use my intellect, not my feelings. If He's already told me what He thinks about church (or to be more specific, about being in a community of Christians), why was I begging Him for an answer? I don't need a specific answer for for every situation I have for the rest of my life. What. Does. He. Say?

I don't think anything catastrophic would've happened if I had missed church today. But as I sat there and reasoned in my half-asleep stupor, I realized we are encouraged to be in community with other believers (Heb. 10:25, 1 Thess. 5:11), and when I go to church I enjoy it and feel better for the rest of the week. So using my knowledge of Scripture and God-given wisdom, I decided to go, and I'm glad I did.

Instead of believing every new "feeling" that comes into my spiritual life, I'm going to cling to what I know Jesus, who is "the same yesterday and today and forever," (Heb. 13:8) has said is true through His Father's Holy Word, and act on and believe in those things. Not that emotions have no place in the Christian's life, but when emotions > intellect, we will be as unstable and uncertain as ships tossed at sea.

"Out of all the voices calling out to me,
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth."
- Casting Crowns, "Voice of Truth"

Decadent Consumer vs. The Christian

You should read this article first: http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/career-money/blog/27112-the-myth-of-financial-freedom

I have some concern over the line that reads, "This practice undoubtedly adds frustration and a good deal more self-analysis into day-to-day activities. Honestly, we chafe at being so constantly under the microscope – until we remember who looks through that microscope and why." I believe that the author had very good intentions writing this article, and that he probably has experienced a change in his life regarding how much he spends on superfluous items (which it sounds like he needed), but I have some thoughts:

1) "Each one must give as he has decided in his heart, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver." - 2 Corinthians 9:7 (ESV)

Don't get me wrong, there's LOTS of scriptures about avoiding greed and the worthlessness of materialism (Ecclesiastes 2:1-10 is a great example of what the evil that happens when materialism reigns, and 5:13 talks about how hoarding money hurts the hoarder), so there is no doubt that, as Christians, we are not to be materialistic or greedy.

However, if you find yourself "chafing" or anxious because you have to scrutinize every purchase to see if it's doing good for God's Kingdom, 2 Corinthians says God's not pleased with that, either. There is a lesson to be learned in giving, and it's this: Joyful surrender of the things the world tells us we need to be secure, so we can fall in the arms of the One who we trust to truly bring us security.

2) Consumerism, handled with wisdom and guidance, isn't always a dirty word. Sometimes earthly possessions really can bring us great joy and happiness, and I see nothing wrong with this. When I was a little girl, I saw a stuffed animal Simba (from The Lion King) toy that I REALLY wanted. I begged my parents, and did chores to "earn" him. I still remember the excitement and happiness I felt when my parents finally bought him for me, and I cherished that toy for years.

As a young adult who is about to graduate and start earning money for herself, I'm trying to decide now how I'm going to use my financial resources, and how I'm going to earn money. Am I going to allow myself to be rich? Do I need to devote my time and skills to full-time ministry? If I become rich, do I need to give more than 10% for my tithes? Should I be giving more than 10% even when I'm not rich? Am I allowed to spend money on something that's just fun?

It'll probably take much trial and error to get this right (hopefully I won't go too far off the deep end before I correct myself), but I think I've decided I am going to allow myself the purchases of things that I've been wanting for a long time, even if they don't do the Kingdom any good, per se. Another example: I've wanted a '59 Dodge pickup since I was a little girl, and I still want one. If I see one that's reasonably priced and I have the financial means for it, I'll probably allow myself to buy it, because it wouldn't be an impulsive buy--I've wanted one for over a decade.

Will I actually do that? Probably not. But I'm giving myself permission to do so, provided the time is right, I have the money, and God isn't calling me to give it elsewhere. His purposes are always going to be foremost, but I just don't think He minds if we have a little fun here and there (as long as we're careful :).

If I ever start to believe that "things" will buy me happiness, then I've for sure gone off the deep end. But sometimes "things" really can make you happy, although there's a common thread between every "thing" I own that I really enjoy: They were not impulsive buys. I thought long and hard before the money was plunked down for them, and decided they were worth having for whatever reason.

My current "happy thing" is my iPad. I'm falling more and more in love with it the more I use it :). Is it the source of all my happiness? Oh heck no. But is it fun to be able to watch Netflix in bed while I'm battling a cold, and have a handy note card maker for classes with Evernote? Absolutely!

Anxious giving and rampant consumerism breed the same thing: Misery. In both cases, you're not trusting God, so you're miserable. When you give, you should push yourself to give however much the Holy Spirit has asked of you. This helps you grow your faith as you see how the whole world didn't fall apart when you trusted God and gave, and your joy and peace increase. When you buy, you should ask yourself if you really want what you're buying, or is it just an impulsive buy. Submit your expenses to God's authority, but beware if you start anguishing over whether God would approve of your buying a $1.50 drink because it "doesn't further His Kingdom" (unless He has called you to that, obviously).

It's tricky to write something like this, because there are so many different ways this could be taken and applied, but just remember: In all things, ask God, and follow His direction. Seek the counsel of Godly friends who will pray with you if you're not sure what that direction is. And in general, remember that moderation is key to darn near everything :).

This blew me away

Maybe some people would be put off by this type of evangelism, and normally I am too, but from what I can tell this man did it with all sincerity and loving concern, and God definitely blessed his witness!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uheP2gXy8g8 (Sorry that it's not a link. When I tried to make it a link, it just disappeared. Weird.)

Also, listen to what he says at the end. Now that is faithfulness!

Conscience: Where Bob Dylan Got It Right and Jiminy Cricket Got It Wrong

"The Preacher was a'talkin',
There's a sermon he gave,
He said every man's conscience
Is vile and depraved.
You cannot depend on it
To be your guide,
When it's you who must
Keep it satisfied." - Bob Dylan, "The Man in the Long Black Coat"

"And always let your conscience be your guide,
Guide, guide!
And always let your conscience be your guide!" - Jiminy Cricket, Pinocchio

Are the Holy Spirit and your conscience the same thing?

Think about that for a minute. I don't know about you, but until very recently I thought that my conscience and the Holy Spirit were one and the same. Unfortunately, I have been run ragged due to this misinformation, my conscience acting like a little imp scurrying around and gleefully dropping a restless question here, a twang of guilt there, and an general sense of unease all over my spiritual life. I have mentioned before that I struggle with legalism, and now I know that it has been my conscience, not God's Holy Spirit, that has been making me feel like I wasn't doing enough or simply wasn't enough spiritually.

So what's the difference? Frankly, I'm still learning this myself, but to put it in simplest terms, the conscience is something everyone is born with, while the Holy Spirit only becomes a part of you after you have received Christ in your life and accept to be under His authority.

"But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all the things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you." - John 14:26 (ESV)

We also know that it's possible to have people who have "depart[ed] from the faith...whose consciences are seared." (1 Tim. 4:1-2) In other words, these people Paul mentions are no longer believers in God, yet they still have a conscience. So whether you're a believer in God or not, you've got a conscience.

So what do we do with this naughty imp that can either help us or harangue us? Again, I'm just beginning to understand all this, but I think that we make ourselves obedient to the Holy Spirit first, then make our consciences obedient to Him, too. But what does it mean to be obedient to the Holy Spirit? It means we look to the Scriptures for the ultimate authority on our lives, and train our consciences to guide us according to that ultimate authority.

"...let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, with our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water." - Heb. 10:22 (ESV)

"But wait!" Jiminy Cricket protests. "Are you saying that my conscience isn't good enough as it is? That I can't always let my conscience be my guide, guide, guide?" Unfortunately, Jiminy, you cannot :(. We are all fallen creatures and harbor our own dark, secret desires. Even people who have given their lives over to God still battle these desires, although these people now have the Holy Spirit to help them fight back. "Every man's conscience is vile and depraved, Jiminy," says Bob Dylan. "You cannot depend on it to be your guide, when it's you who must keep it satisfied."

As Christians, we need to study the Scriptures to learn how to train our conscience (which can be persuaded by the world or our own dark interests) to match what God asks of us. However, we must also be careful to not ignore our consciences completely, as sometimes they even contradict Scripture, but it's not entirely wrong that they do:

"Therefore, as to the eating of food offered to idols, we know that an idol has no real existence, and that there is no God but one...However, not all possess this knowledge. But some, through former association with idols, eat food as really offered to an idol, and their conscience, being weak, is defiled. Food will not commend us to God. We are no worse off if we do not eat, and no better off if we do. But take care that this right of yours does not somehow become a stumbling block to the weak. For if anyone sees you who have knowledge eating in an idol's temple, will he not be encouraged, if his conscience is weak, to eat food offered to idols?" - 1 Cor. 8:4, 7-10 (ESV)

So in this case, it would be OK for that "weak" brother to listen to his conscience rather than the truth that there is no other God but One, because as a former idol-worshiper he still has lingering thoughts that the old idols are real. Therefore, out of respect and love for God and a tender conscience, he abstains from eating the meat, even though it would be perfectly OK for him to eat it.

Listen when your conscience is tender about something that either isn't in the Scriptures or seems a little contradictory to the Scriptures (within reason!), but don't attempt to make your conscience tender about something. That leads to legalism. Train your conscience to follow God's Scriptures, but train yourself to listen and respond to the things your conscience feels sensitive toward. You need a dash of Bob Dylan's cynicism and Jiminy Cricket's optimism, mixed with a healthy and thorough understanding of Scripture, to have a realistic and helpful view and use of your conscience.